Transforming the Ego with ADV – Part-1

Amandha: I got it. I got it. And then, you know, boom, I got it. You know what I mean? And so this one just hit home. People are really dangerous when they’re in that state that they haven’t done that work because they are like, just like animals at that point. Because they are only, they’re stimula being stimulated by cues in their, what they’ve manifested in their outside reality and they’re.

Amandha: Pinging them off themselves and they become a danger to themselves and a danger to others because then they can attack, they can ridicule judge. They can, you know what I mean? That the snake comes out behind them and there’s, and then they can switch like on a dime. I’ve seen it.

Amandha: It’s like that’s the demonic energy, you know what I mean? Of their subconscious dark mind like jealousy. I’ve seen it, I’ve seen it like people who are jealous or envious. as an example where maybe their, so their inner ego aspect, they don’t feel good enough, they don’t feel worthy, or they’ve had something happen in their life that makes them feel worthless or like they didn’t achieve something or whatever they wanted to do in their life.

Amandha: They weren’t able to do that and they, that’s a wound, right? And we all have wounds and the wound hits the ego. But if you haven’t resolved the wound and you haven’t brought into light and you haven’t dealt with that nugget, then that is in the shadow and that will come out as surges and you can attack people.

Amandha: So for example, then you meet a very successful person who has their life together or whatever, or they happen to do the thing that you wanted to do and they did it really awesome and way better. And it’s like, and then you are like, Suck because I’m not like them. And this start the tapes, start going.

Amandha: That’s one of the things we’ll talk about is the mind tapes. You’re triggered into your mind tapes, the little voice inside your head going, well, you suck. And she what makes her so much better than me. This starts going, and then if you’re really in the non-conscious level of things, then you will hurt.

Amandha: Because what will happen is deep down, you’ll wanna sabotage their success to make yourself feel better because you haven’t resolved that properly. And that’s why unresolved people in their egos can be very dangerous people because they’re going to act out of impulse. They’re not acting. From their consciousness.

Amandha: They’re not self-reflecting on their behavior. They’re just letting that run them. They’re letting the subconscious run their bodies and drive their behavior. You see, and like I al I already knew that, but I mean, after this moon I really realized, I really saw that in my life where, why I’ve isolated myself even more.

Amandha: From a lot of people because as you become a very clear mirror, as so as you raise your consciousness higher and you’ve done this work a long time, what happens is you become a very clean mirror for people and when they come to you, and this is also why healers are very powerful, cuz healers often are already thrown into their full ego work and their mirrors are very shiny.

Amandha: And when someone comes. Look at you and they see that shiny mirror. All they see back in are themselves. And if their if their own reflective absorption is, if they have their own dirty mirror, they’re gonna get all kinds of Distortions happening, and we’ll talk about that in a second. A little bit more about the mirror, how the mirror works.

Amandha: Okay? Because it doesn’t always work as a mirror to a mirror in an infinite, you know, when mirrors get put together and you get that infinity cool thing going on you don’t always get that if the one mirror’s angled differently or dirty or whatever, right? And they’re going to get a distortion. You have to be careful because if that distortion for them, Going to blame you for showing them the mirror.

Amandha: Be you better get your defenses up cuz they’re going to attack. Try to bring you down so that they can feel better. That’s a very egoic thing to do. People do that all the time. They have to try to knock you down A few pegs. Narcissists do this all the time. They’re full blown ego. They’re full blown asleep.

Amandha: Ego, that’s a narcissist and they’re, they have to try to hurt the mirror or break that mirror because they don’t wanna see it. They can’t even handle seeing it in themselves. Right. They’re like children, ego, egos, child, like, or an emotional aspect if that’s stuck at childhood and they haven’t developed that ego past.

Amandha: You know, you can study Carl Jung and all these people to get like, really, like nerdy on it, but I’m just talking about from here’s the experience of the interactions. Okay? Alright, so let’s get into my notes. Let me have a sip of my caffeine. Strong tea with coconut oil because I got woken up this morning way too early,

Amandha: I’m like, okay, I’m gonna need some help today after that moon. I don’t know, like see some people in astrology, some people feel the cycles. Depends on where everything is in your houses, how you feel it, how you tr, how it’s triggering you, right? It’s all individual. Some people may have had an awesome Pisces New Moon and like they were all just, you know, loving everybody.

Amandha: Boundaryless or whatever. Some people probably cried like for three days and just like through that, cause Pisces is super sensitive. Or some people might have had. Totally clairvoyant, like amazing or even confusing images or sounds or something like from the ether, right? Or dreams might have been.

Amandha: Whoa. Like my dreams were definitely, whoa. I had freaky dreams during that moon. Whatever. Right. Or your fantasies could have been more, because Pisces is the Fanta, the fantasy island of the astrology world., what is your fantasy? We will make it a reality. But okay, so you see the, it depends on your whole aspect.

Amandha: I like astro.com. It’s not a totally a hundred percent foolproof at, you know, but it’s good enough. It’s good enough to know. Some of your houses, if you were new to astrology, you wanna figure that because guess what? The aspects of the wandering stars, cause they’re not planets, the wandering stars, they’re basically gods.

Amandha: They’re demigods energetically. They pulse on us and they affect our ego. So the more in ego you are or the more the ego, those aspects bring out ego. That’s what it’s playing on. If you’re really self-realized, you kind of transcend, you’re basically ascended master at that point., when tho, when those planetary bodies, when those wandering stars have no impact on you anymore.

Amandha: You’re outta here because you’re done, probably done half the work you came to do because they can’t influence you anymore. The moon doesn’t influence any you anymore, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.. Okay. The, so the whole point, I think I mean there’s mul multiple layers to this place. One of the things you wanna do is transform that ego so that, if not a breeze could touch a hair on your head sort of idea.

Amandha: It’s beyond water off a duck’s back. You know what I mean? Someone could say something, it’s like, meh. That touched me. That did not disturb me. I am resolved. I am realized that those words. that they don’t touch me. Like, have you ever watched reality television? That is like an ego, orgy,. If you wanna ever study ego, that’s all you gotta do is watch most of television and you’ll find all of that.

Amandha: The, these are like the drama queens on the, you know, like Project Runway. You wanna study it, watch that show. They’re all like girl, right? I mean, I don’t know. I heard the time it says, Right, that. There you go. They’re in full blown ego. Just, they’re like little their lives are running them.

Amandha: They are not in charge of their lives.

Amandha: Do you know what I’m saying? They’re being run by their impulses. That’s the difference. Alright if you have any questions, you know, comment let’s me know. I’m gonna go through my paperwork. Oh, hello Lucy. My doggies here, take three. TE Hall, she’s is definitely an ego

Amandha: So let’s begin. I have artwork on the back of my, so I used to have a lot of time and I used to paint, so there’s a naked body. There you go. Probably get censored for that, right? There’s one I made that one. This is just copies of big print, big paintings. That’s Mother Earth I made out of ink and paint.

Amandha: It’s a beautiful, it’s beautiful colors. See if there’s another cool one. Oh her. That’s mother. That’s mother Earth. Pretty cool. Okay, so number one is, well, actually it’s probably totally out of order. So there’s no really one, there’s just all of them dump the drama. So, as I was saying, the ego loves to waste time with petty dramas, ping pong arguments, ping pong, and emotional moodiness.

Amandha: A wise man walks away from immature drama or a wise woman, just don’t play that game, homie. Don’t play that. Okay? So the second someone’s trying to pull you into a drama, your ego’s involved and you better the light up and start to recognize that and catch it early before you get pulled in. Sometimes if it’s a karmic contract, you can, you’ll be shrouded.

Amandha: You won’t see. You won’t see it. You’re pulled in, you’re in it. You’re like, how the hell did this happen? Here I am. Better deal with it. And although sometimes you’re not shrouded and you can feel yourself getting pulled into a drama, the best thing to do if you sense that, first of all, you need to identify that it’s drama and then you want to close it off as soon as possible, whatever that drama.

Amandha: Close it off. Doesn’t mean you don’t speak your voice. It’s actually the opposite. You have to speak your truth if that’s what’s called in that moment to stand and speak your truth like this is not acceptable. I don’t agree with that. I’m, I really would like to just stop. This conversation for now, but I respect what you wanna say, but I’d like to do it when we’re less emotional.

Amandha: Whatever you need to say to be respectful, but step away from it. Because if you can feel that, that ego being pulled in, you’re gonna make a mess, you’re gonna make mud, and you’re gonna make more karma and you’re gonna make more. and if you are conscious being, you are responsible for that and you stop it as soon as you possibly can.

Amandha: And if you need, if it needs to, Be addressed later, then that’s what you acknowledge and then you walk away. Okay? Like some, I had karmic ex-partner always try to pull me in. Oh, constantly. Narcissist, really get that, constantly trying to pull you into trouble, constantly trying to make. A drama always.

Amandha: It’s like that’s what they do, like game playing all the time. And there’s a technique for narcissists called Gray Rock, where you’re just, so, it’s almost like that, except it’s a it’s still, you can still interact with Gray Rock. You’re like, yes, no, bye it’s about it. You’re not being emotionally pulled at all.

Amandha: If you’re being emotionally pulled, then you know what? You have to take responsibility for that and go and reflect on that and look at that journal, paint, dance, whatever.

Amandha: Whatever it brings out in you now, you have to own it. Acknowledge it and bring it through. And I think that’s the, that’s one of them.

Amandha: Somewhere in here. I’ll get to that. But anyway, that is, that’s what you have to do. You have to own it, and you have to now acknowledge it and speak to it. My, my teacher would say, you have to actually speak to it. I am angry and I am bringing compassion with me. That was her technique. You could do tapping.

Amandha: It’s very similar. Tapping is like acknowledging it and then bringing it through. I feel really sad right now. I do. I feel it. I feel sad right now. I teach this to my daughter to ha so she has an emotional intelligence. What are you feeling right now? How did that make you feel? What’s the identifying emotion that this did for you?

Amandha: What is it? Sadness, anger, rejection. What? What did it for you? Okay, so that’s how you’re feeling. Why are you feeling like that? Where’s it coming? Okay, good. Now you’ve picked it up. You’re holding it, you’re acknowledging it. It’s there, it’s real for you. You’re not denying it. You’re not pushing it back.

Amandha: You’re not ignoring it. Okay. Yeah, that’s real. I feel that now I’m gonna speak to it. I’m gonna make it alive so I can put it in the morgue., I will make it alive so I could kill it., essentially, right, because you’re trying, that’s the transformation aspect of it, right? Okay. I see that is painful for me.

Amandha: I can identify with that. Okay, so now I’m gonna speak to that in a compassionate way. I feel anger, I feel sadness, I feel rejection, I feel upset in some way, and I’m gonna bring compassion with., and I’m gonna pull that through and I’m gonna, I’m gonna shape that for myself. And it’s a really powerful exercise to do because it’ll immediately calm the the neural net, the neural net and the triggers in you that continue, the tapes that make the tapes go, it calms down the brain, calms down your nervous system because when that happens, your nervous system gets triggered.

Amandha: you know, your heart rate goes up, the cortisol goes up if you’re triggered like that, right? And this is a way of like, breathe bitch, you know, like calm. You’re calming yourself, you’re self soothing, you’re self soothing essentially. Alright, so jump the drama. Speaker truth, even if it’s ugly. Yeah. In order to clear an energy that is attempting to release, one must speak to it.

Amandha: So this is what I was saying. For example, I’m feeling angry and I bring compassion with. If you are afraid to speak because you are concerned that someone won’t like you, this is egoic. Okay? You do a great service to all when you speak your truth in the moment. Now, I’m not talking about when it’s drama.

Amandha: I’m talking about in the moment when you identify something that’s not acceptable to you, okay? Somebody is doing something that’s not acceptable to you. You can still lovingly, doesn’t have to be rude, speak. Because you do a great service by standing in your truth and in your power and your authenticity because it assists another to do their own.

Amandha: In that regard, it helps someone else do that. Be brave, right? So fake nice, which Canadians are very good for. Fake. Nice is just that. To be real is to be truthful. Then you will attract integrity to all of your, what we would call the spheres of your life. So all the creational aspects of your whole reality.

Amandha: You’ll start to resolve those and you will bring truth into them and you will make them in such, make your lifestyle in such a way that is not penetrable by the drama makers. They have to get, and we’ll talk about this at the mirrors, they have to get super duper, duper refined and clever to get in and to get you down, to get that ego down.

Amandha: See, this is the trick. The more you work on this, the better you get. The early stuff of the ego is easy as pie is easy. It’s when you get refined. It’s when you really start to master that and you, and the mistake is thinking that you’re you. It’s. The work’s done. Yeah, I got that. Got that. Been there. I got the t-shirt.

Amandha: Do do. No. It’s never done.. That’s the catch. Someone will always try to trip you up. This is not a realm for wimps. This is a realm for work and it’s constantly going to be there and an on guard. And if you drop your guard, you, it’s going to get in, it’s gonna worm its way in, or it’s going to work on a weakness or an aspect of ego that’s so subtle.

Amandha: You didn’t see it, you didn’t see it until you, you’ve already been, you know, whipped by it. Right? The damage will be done. You’ll be like, holy cow, I didn’t even see that. Whoa, where that did not come from? Why didn’t I see that? Why was I blind to that? Wow. but the, as you get better and better at it, this is what starts to happen.

Amandha: So just be prepared for that. Okay. So I’m just gonna see alright, so taking full responsibility for your creations. There’s no one or nothing to blame. Ultimately, from the ego perspective, everything is just your projection coming from your holographic mind. And it’s like a film reel for yourself.

Amandha: And so it’s like we would say, this is work that I did. This is work that I, that came through me when I was with living with my spiritual teacher. She just knocked on my door and came and lived with me for a year and then left after a year. That’s the weird stuff that happens in my life. just outta nowhere.

Amandha: And when I was doing, so, when I was triggered into this as a full-time job, this was like a full-time job for me as a transformation. I wrote all this out and it was based on, we’d have morning meetings and discussing all of this right, and what would come up for us, and it was very introspective work.

Amandha: Lots and lots of meditating, lots of. Challenging ego work. You know, identifying everything. Every day was a test. Every, it was a year of amazing. It was amazing, but it was very difficult. But anyway, we would say, own your Kaka.. Own your kaka. Okay. You made the own the gk. And that’s just taking full responsibility now in an environment with a mate or friend or whatever, what that means is not letting anyone walk all over you, okay?

Amandha: There’s a difference. But what it is you are, whatever the interaction is, you can’t possibly go into a blame. Energy because what you’re doing is everything that has occurred in that interaction is actually what, as a practice you take on as a responsibility for yourself. Always. First, you are the one to own it.

Amandha: A, a mistake happens, you own it first, like, It doesn’t even matter what it is, what you think, that somebody is somebody else’s fault. The first step to real, the realization and the lesson is you own it all. First as if you actually did that mistake you are the one who did that. Like, Canada Post lost like quite a few of my shipments.

Amandha: I got customers coming at me. Where is it? Whatever. It’s Canada Post fault. They screwed up. Okay, got it. I did. I did all my work there and made sure I put proper complaints in and whatever. Fine. Done, but I own it. Okay I hired them, okay. Right. I’m the one who’s contracted with them. Okay. It’s my responsibility, those customers, that’s my responsibility that they get the thing that they ordered from me.

Amandha: So if that has to come out of pocket, That’s gonna have to come out of pocket. My responsibility, I own it. And what’s interesting when you do that is it allows for the proper resolve for the other party or parties involved to balance that out. So oftentimes when you do that, when you take that ownership and that responsibility fully the it allows the space for the other party to go, oh, wait a second.

Amandha: Like that was partly my fault too. So here’s how I’ll balance that out. But if you just go and you go, you did that, what? Why’d you do that? Right? Like, What will happen is that you get a pushback. Will they? They’ll go into defensive mode. They won’t. There’s no offer coming back at you. It’s gonna be the total other way.

Amandha: They’re going to pull out more from you. You see the best thing is like, you know, it’s, you know, let me look at that. Let me see where am I? Don’t, I don’t see it now, or my ego’s triggered. Now I’m gonna walk away and I’m gonna reflect on that. And if I have hurt you, I’m very sorry and I let me.. Let me just sit with that.

Amandha: If you approach life like that, things go so much easier. So much easier. Just own it. Like even this morning, the, this is a good test for me. Woo. Because I morning, me being disturbed and precious morning sleep is like always rocks my ego, it’s always a test for me. But in the morning, And that’s why I woke.

Amandha: Ah, you’re funny. This whole ego trip thing. And then the trigger that I had to do a video in the morning when I’m like, not in my clearest mind. Right? It’s like, yeah. Funny. But I knew I had to do it, so here I am. Right. Okay. So in this morning, 10 to seven, I hear like chalkboard nails across the ground and there’s like, there’s a backhoe scraping the ground like and it shakes my house.

Amandha: My house is like a pirate ship. It’s on a marsh. It’s like a, it’s like, Concrete slab on a marsh. So everything moves my house. Like cars going by big trucks. Like you can feel it, right? Like it bounces. So I’m not, it’s not just a sound, it’s a vibration., right? So I woke like bad. I’m like what the hell is it?

Amandha: The end is it finally come I get up, I’m like, what the hell? The hell? So I was thrown. You see I was rock. It was thrown off so that can be an ego trigger right now. So I’m like, mother, you know, I’m like all over there. Butts like, what are you doing? Why would you do this? blame, right? Your fault. Why would you do it?

Amandha: Stupid township. Doesn’t care about people, doesn’t care about tax paying citizens to disturb a single mother in her last hour of sleep. He works half the night, right? Like trigger. You see? And I caught myself. And I went, oh, this is, so, I guess the moon is like still bleeding out

Amandha: It’s like, oh no, we’re not just gonna give you a little bit, we’re gonna give you blood. Oh, it’s a whole momentum. Well, thank you. And I, but I did catch myself and then I said, okay, I’m gonna own this one. Okay. It has nothing to really do with me per se, but the., there’s a gift in it always. And I’m gonna still own.

Amandha: I chose to live here. I thought this was a good place for us to live. You know, this township was the cute, you know, I thought all these things, here I am and this is the way it goes. Maybe I wanna speak my truth to it and address it when I’m calm emotionally and mention to the township that I don’t really appreciate that’s not really cool with me.

Amandha: Like, doesn’t mean I don’t have, I have to be walked all over. I. Address that in a mature, responsible way. But how I really wanted to do was call, what the hell you’re fucking doing. So that’s ego, right? Okay. So one of the other tips of ego is, wait,, you have something happening? Wait a while, you think you’re supposed to do something?

Amandha: Are you sure? Is it, is your heart? Does your heartbeat, do you feel an adrenal surge? Do you feel like this energy like, Ugh, I. Then wait because you’re gonna make a mess.

Amandha: Once you’re refined in that and you’ve taken the time to crystallize your creation, then you act. And that’s working with God. That’s working with nature.

Amandha: Nature doesn’t go, yeah, we’re just gonna.. I don’t know. We’ll just bloom this. It’s right in the, you know, March. If things are blooming now, they’d be dead. It’s too cold. Right? Everything has its timing. Its maturity. Wait, that is a key thing. You wanna act, you wanna tell someone that they’re a asshole? Wait,

Amandha: Just take a minute. Just take a minute. Because the ego is, IM. And trust me, I know that’s my biggest challenge is impatience because I’m fast thinker. I’m a fast doer. Right. I’m fast and when things then slow down, I’m like, Ooh. Oh, right,. I’m like, this is annoying. This is just annoying. Why can’t everything just move at my pace?

Amandha: Because I like to go super fast cuz I have a fire path. Right. Yeah, it doesn’t always work like that. And it’s not always to your advantage, so just slow it right down and take a breather and then come back to it. And that’s the best way. And like you don’t always just paint a piece of art really fast and that’s it.

Amandha: I mean, sometimes you do, and sometimes when you do that and you’re not in ego, it’s amazing and it’s brilliant. You can’t even believe you did it. But when you come, but when, usually it’s a masterful thing where you come back, you take breather, like I’m writing this huge article right now on. House resolution 3 27 to dismantle it.

Amandha: And I’m, and it’s like, it’s whoa. It’s like, it’s a lot of writing, it’s a lot of citations. It’s like heavy and I want it to be done fast, right? Because I’m, I have people wanting it, so I want it. I’m like, no, everything has its own time. Stop thinking that you are in control of this. You are not.

Amandha: Take a step. Let it be edited. Don’t look at it for a couple days, then come back to it. Fresh eyes, because now you’re gonna make less mistakes that way. It’s going to come across crispr, right? Is it what’s the word? Couple days? What’s the big deal? See what I’m saying? Alright. I might have said that one of, that one I think was on my list.

Amandha: If you hold a mirror, if you are in relationship. Okay. Okay. Let’s talk about. His mirrors are challenging because it’s not cut and dry. Everyone’s like, oh, oh, if you feel this, oh, this is the most annoying ego thing ever. This is, this one always annoyed me the most annoyed. My ego, the most always got to me is when another ego says to my ego, well, if that bothers you, then you have it too, right?

Amandha: that thing. It’s like, yeah. Okay. Careful. Careful how we ascend is like this. It’s in a spiral format, but it’s a spiral on an angle. Like this. This is how we go like this and this. Now notice what’s happening. You are ascending up a spiral of your own consciousness, right? You are rising.

Amandha: Then as before you get to the next rise, you are actually going to go down a little bit and then you go to the next one.

Amandha: That’s how it works, and if you so say, You have something that is annoying that you used to do, like,, the, like my trait, like my, one of my weaknesses is being moody in the morning. The moody morning thing. Okay. Because I’m tired. I mean, anyone’s tired. It’s hard to, right. But it’s still a mind thing. I can blame my tiredness on the behavior you see, but it’s not it’s fault.

Amandha: It’s still my choice, how I, what I do with that. Right. Okay. And. that, so that say, that’s my thing. And then I see that in., right? Then I’m like, okay, so that’s bothering me that they have it, they are moody in the morning and that it’s, it triggers that. I’m like that, okay, that’s just a, that’s like a mirror reflection, let’s say.

Amandha: Now I’ve transmuted or transformed that, so actually in the mornings I figured it out. Like in the mornings I’m pretty good. I get up at the right time. I have like a, I make sure there’s a me time that I can just, you know, gently come into my morning or whatever. Even if it’s a crazy morning, even if a trawler, whatever the heck that thing was, wakes you up, you can still reset your day.

Amandha: You don’t have to let it ruin your day, that whole thing. So you’re up here now. So you were here and you came up the spiral of it, and you’ve, you’re here, but then you meet someone and they’re here and you’re seeing that in them, right? Some people go and then that, but that kind of, but you identify that, you’re like, oh, look, that person.

Amandha: they’re grumpy in the morning. Do you notice that? Do you notice that person’s grumpy in the morning? Someone else could say to you, oh, that’s because you have it. And it’s the one of the most annoying and misunderstood things because Yeah, true. I get it. But you used to have that and you now have a thread of that.

Amandha: It’s different it’s different. You will still see it in another, the aspect in which you have transformed in yourself. You can still see it, and it just is a test. Usually it’s just a trigger or a test or a little ego kind of blip. Yeah. But if you’ve transformed it, you can still see it in another, especially actually, but it doesn’t mean you’re there, and it doesn’t mean it’s the thing that you are do you see the difference? Do you see what I’m saying? You could be down there with them, which could be up there and still see it. And the mirror is different because you’ve ascended through that spiral phase. You’ve figured out everything. Doesn’t mean you can’t drop down the spiral for a bit and taste that and experience that.

Amandha: Again. Sometimes that sets you right. Sometimes that gets you right back up there again, right? But it, but sometimes you master that and then you can help another through it. If it’s something that you’ve gone through and you’ve struggled with, then you can master that and help another. Okay, well it’s almost 10 and I haven’t really gone through all of them.

Amandha: So what I’ll do is I’ll make this part one and then I’ll do a second part for the rest of the ego bits, cause probably everyone’s going to work anyway. I’ll put this on YouTube, and if you’re on YouTube, please like, subscribe to you the little happy dance for me and share.

Amandha: And let’s get the egos under control, please.

Amandha: if they’re helpful.

Amandha: Certain egos are very helpful and sometimes entertaining. We’re meant though to understand and unravel that and bring that into the light. Really be happy people when we do that work. Right. It’s a challenge and it’s, it is work. It is effort.

Amandha: If you do the work though, it’s very rewarding.

Amandha: I will finish these this paperwork.

Amandha: Maybe, well, I don’t know when yet. Depends on how the day goes. I could probably do it after four o’clock. So stay tuned for that, and I hope you have a lovely day and a sunny day and begin to pull these things into your awareness of., when you see drama, when you’re triggered, what you do, how you own it how you make things a bit more peaceful in your life.

Amandha: Because we deserve to have some peace.. I think doesn’t have to be all hard. Right., well anyway, we’ll talk to you again soon and again thanks for joining me and have a wonderful day. Bye-bye.